“Fuck. That’s put me off me dinner.”
I look up in time to see him and his cronies turn away in laughter. And then he takes another bite of hamburger anyway. And then they continue to laugh and laugh and laugh beyond any reasonable point of cruelty. What grade A cunts.
No. I’ve got that wrong.
At least a cunt is warm and inviting, and is usually possessed by somebody who’s glad you’re in the room. And they’ve willingly let you in. Why? Because you’re you, and they like that, and that’s okay. Makes me wonder why cunt has ever been used as a pejorative in the first place.
I wish I was with a cunt right now. Anywhere but here.
So, who’s the tool two tables over? Well, he’s the complete opposite of a cunt, that’s for goddam sure. In fact, I’d call him a dick. No, hang on… I like dicks! I mean, sure, not other dicks. Just mine. It’s not like I go around sucking random dicks or anything. And I’m not saying mine’s the best dick out there either. Dicks, by and large, are simple, unassuming things. In short, a dick’s a dick, and just as there’s nothing inherently wrong with cunts, so too with dicks.
Okay, so he’s not a dick or a cunt. Maybe he’s just not very nice. I’ll have to settle for that.
Note to self: Whenever in public food court, sit with cauliflower ear facing wall. Preferably mirrorless kind. That way, no one sees and laughs. Or sees and comments. Or worse still, sees then completely looks away.
I think my heart is going to kill me.
by TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2018
unbolt me 
Wow I loved this read! Your thought on this got me intrigued!
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’re welcome! Thank you for reading! 😀
LikeLiked by 2 people
Hi Tetiana Now that post is food for thought. Thank you for liking “So Easy!” Be Safe. #TheFoureyedPoet.
LikeLiked by 3 people
Thanks Malcolm! I enjoyed writing it!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Those are ASSholes. Stinking, staming, dark, putrid ASSHoles. The end.
LikeLiked by 3 people
I couldn’t have put it any better! 😛
LikeLiked by 2 people
I think there’s a special planet waiting for peeps like that. They can all hang out together and stupid themselves to death and leave the rest of us in peace!!! And I LOVE this post….HATE what happened…and I’m sorry….but I agree about the whole “c” word thing. 🤣 See. I can’t even write it!!! 😄 You’re absolutely wonderful. Cheers!!! 💖☀️🐬
LikeLiked by 3 people
And I meant can’t write it as I have been SOOOOO conditioned not to! Lord!
LikeLiked by 2 people
Aw, thank you! And I completely understand about that word. I think it pushes a lot of people’s buttons, so you certainly wouldn’t be alone in that! 😛
LikeLiked by 2 people
Right?!! Goodness, I’m an ‘F’ bomb dropper for sure. And I do use the c word…if I’m very upset and not around anyone but a friend. But even then, here in the States that word is SOOOOOO taboo!!! People look at You like You’ve stepped on a kitten when You say it. So….it’s a rare occurrence!!! 🤣
LikeLiked by 2 people
You’ve just told me something I didn’t know at all! I wasn’t aware that the ‘c’ word had such power in America! I’ll keep this in mind in future. 😛
LikeLiked by 2 people
🤣 Oh no! Keep being YOU!!! You are absolutely perfect!!! Oh wait…now I’m laughing….perhaps You mean if an American pisses You off, now You have very easy ammo!!! 🤣 Whatever You meant…..Rock on! Cheers!!! ☀️🐬😄
LikeLiked by 2 people
It would take a hell of a lot for an American to piss me off. I LIKE Americans! They’re among the friendliest people in the world! 😛
LikeLiked by 2 people
🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people
I love the way you use hyperlinks.
LikeLiked by 2 people
Thanks! We do love to lead our readers on a merry little goose chase… 😛
LikeLiked by 2 people
Dang. I would never poke fun of someone with a cauliflower ear on the assumption that they got it fighting someone else. And if that’s the case, they might want to introduce me to the technique firsthand. And I do not believe that’s something I want to explore at this stage in my life. Besides, after just finishing ACDF surgery I have a masterful scar on my neck that is sure to receive some stares just as soon as I’m well enough to begin wandering the earth again.
Show that ear loud and proud! No one knows how to earned it!
LikeLiked by 4 people
Holy crap, that sounds major! I hope it went well for you, sir! And, I think you’re right, one should never be ashamed of the way they look. Thanks for reading, Dave!
LikeLiked by 2 people
I consider myself not a prude. You used my favourite word. The F-bomb! Then you used my least favourite word(ironically worse than wrong or moist!) and I couldn’t read any further. Sad face, H
LikeLiked by 3 people
Aw, that’s okay, Helen. Hopefully there’ll be more to come that you’ll be able to read instead. We won’t always plan on using that word. 🙂
LikeLiked by 2 people