Tag Archives: Poem

Hocus-Pocus Lotus Locos 2: Petrarchan Sonnets PART 3 ~ The ‘Down The Rabbit Hole’ collaboration

< < < Back to seeds and roots

< < < Previous Scabrousness

“Angels fly as fools die! Aiiii!” she bellowed as her clothes caught hold
on a stick in the mud, sticking out a hole in the wall, breaking her fall.
“I order you pull me off from fucking hook!” came her command while
face to hat, hanging upside-down by undergarments — “Why petticoat
princess? No, I love your unholy pantalooned look!” the Bastard spoke.
“Mat’ tvoyu za nogu! (Grab your mother at her leg!) V rot tebe parokhod!
(Shove a steamboat into your mouth!)” and the Slavic for “You’re a bald-
coot slimeball!” (Ty pleshivyy urod!) the Black-Crowned Yew-Crane crowed.

Bastion’s confused expression, and crooked hat, however, quickly caused
Petra to lose her shit, and laugh her ass off, before saying, “Baiyan cat,
you can eat Petra” which confused the poor bastard more, so he coughed
awkwardly, thinking she meant her pussy, which oddly enough, she did as
her predicament was briefly forgotten, but still furious, regained her cross
posture, and let fly the beautiful curses, hushing Bastion’s ballsy sarcasm.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & RY HAKARI
© All rights reserved 2015

Hocus-Pocus Lotus Locos 2: Petrarchan Sonnets PART 2 ~ The ‘Down The Rabbit Hole’ collaboration

< < < Back to seeds and roots

< < < Previous Scabrousness

Next Scabrousness > > >

Petra inquired “Anyone home?”, and in getting his “All’s well in this well”
in reply, she asked “What you do?”, received a sly “Well, well manager”
and yelled “Well, well, well! How rude! Are you token rodent that purrs?”
“Drop dead, my friend” he mumbled under his breath, and said, “Hell,
I guess, princess. See all the sixpence?” She sputtered, “Demon spell
make you toke too much! How ass hat know Petra Princess? Know her?”
“All princesses are no more than a purse! If you lead a horse to water,
you can’t make ’em drink!” — “You the whore who needs help, infidel!”

“I’m the virgin bastard of Cheshire! I have heard of you! The Empusa
with the flaming ash-blonde locks!” he spoke, and she, flattered, said,
“You have sexy dirty Medusa hair too, so Petra not stone you! Umm…”
and petrified, Bastion heard “Sacred Loti, for the girly boy!” with dread
as she returned tumbling head o’er heels o’er the edge like a lush-klutz
hush-hush lust-drunk — Because fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & RY HAKARI
© All rights reserved 2015

Knight Errant ~ The one ‘Knight’s tour problem’ collaboration

I’m lucky. Really, guys, I’m lucky!

Can you boast of two collaborations with Tony Single without a break? I can! Collaborating with Tony is a great joy. An exceptional joy.

Because Tony is exceptional.  Artist. Wastrel. A quantum of potential. Aha!
A fucking ideal. I can’t even believe that he’s real! Hey, Tony! Are you real?

Thank you, Tony… and let us go to the next collaboration? Please, please!

crossed-swords_p

Lanterns shine too bright
and water drops too loud.
I’m a lonely knight
standing opposite the crowd.

Lances jut too pointy
at queens too busy quilting.
Quintains feel too jaunty
for serious windmill tilting.

The firmament gets bleak.
Clouds weave the decoy node.
Pinnacled rooks beak
apples on the patchwork road.

Full import and all portent,
or is this mere priestly babble?
Preaching safe from beside the war tent,
in unholy war they dabble.

A phthisical bishop spits blood
into cream roadside manure.
The left quintain falls with a thud
losing its air-headed allure.

The right quintain sprouts lambent wings
and a halo for a hero’s journey.
It can have my heart as I’ve no wish to depart,
to forswear my stratagems twisty turny.

But it’s zugzwang, and I’m too tired to prate.
God save my Queen! I U-turn at one fling,
and make public a smothered selfmate
for my despicable sterile King.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2015

Hocus-Pocus Lotus Locos ~ The one inappropriately funny collaboration

Next Scabrousness > > >

Within the English Province of Cheshire,
Sacred Lotus flourishes along the mire.
Beneath the Cattails, up Lotus’ holed lace
a little boy once tilted his curious face….

Sometimes the Sacred Loti makes scared boys
unable to count to ten, wind-blown, maladroit.

For Bastion though, close only counted in horseshoes
(and hand grenades, which made him afraid), whose
fear of holes and need for control, was never dulled
no matter how many blanks he filled… not until grown.

Sometimes Noblemen are bequeathed ignoble fortunes,
if the Bastard’s slung arrows of outrageous abhorrence…

Such was the illicit got lot, of the Noble Bastard Bastion of Cheshire
in scorning horned redhead Romani’s fiery desires, who after awhile
with amourette brunettes, dark-haired donnas who Amaretto-binged
(after they spilt their guts, just for him to jilt their milk when he split),
hell-raised a harem’s unquenchable revenge against him ’til the poor
Cheshire sour-puss’s head curiously dropped down dead… premature.

Pissed off bombshells led by a hush-hush Slavic blonde mistress
fueled by rage and Vodka to the cooch-tease with the coin fetish,
with a candlestick, snatched his Lota lamp bank; Rubbing limp dick
to the nymphets who wished to get laid, Bastion could only get lit
putting coins in puss-purses, infuriating the reverse gang-rapists
smashing the flaccid shell of the nervous turtle lacking firmness!

Left shortly with a healing chode, he slowly hit the road, not heeling
those daughters of Achilles, who couldn’t snatch the snapper weenie.
No longer playing pipe, Full Monty python no longer dancing pantless,
in quicksand sinking, bit the harem heels crushing his head, heedless.

Sometimes escaping out the frying pan, just means landing in fire.
Sprung free, he quickly jumped down a well he wished to fill higher!

Within and throughout the English Province of Cheshire,
Sacred Lotus flourishes along the mired, long admired
Sixpence desires, which more than once made a dent
with heads and tails in the Tomcat’s smile, at last rent.

Sometimes the wide abyss of heaven’s holey gate opens,
to rain misfortune thick upon Bastards with slot tokens!

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & RY HAKARI
© All rights reserved 2015

Oops!… We Did It Again (a Chain)

Erm… hullo there. (This is rather awkward…)

Dear Reader, the stuff that was originally posted here has been removed.

We have done this because said stuff has since been included in one of our published books. We hope you’ll believe us when we say we’re not trying to be stingy. No, this has been done to honour the people who have already spent their hard-earned money on our eBook creations.*

If, however, for some reason you’re unable to buy one of our books, and feel you’ll die without seeing this piece of writing, then please contact us via admin@unbolt.me. We won’t allow our Dear Readers to fade away in the dark. We’ll send you the piece in question, and it will be absolutely free. All you need do is ask.

* Of course, we would be like two happy puppies if you too decided to buy one of our books.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2015-2018