MMORPB // Tati & Tony in Raiders of the Lost Snark Part Three (Moderately Multiplayer Online Role Playing Book 18+)

or: EPISODE 3 // Where Tati Gives Tony a Fungus Face

 

In our previous episode, Tati and Tony met at the Greater Cachalot Mall in international waters. As they nitpicked at one another, a mysterious man in black turned up and quietly made a beeline for Tony’s suitcases…

Tati sighed. “Okey dokey. Let’s go to reception. I’m dying to take a shower.” She pulled a map from her pants pocket and unfolded it over a nearby café table.

“Why couldn’t we have met in front of the hotel itself?” asked Tony, scratching the top of his head with a quizzical look.

“Conspiracy!”

“Conspiracy?” Tony blinked in confusion.

After ascertaining the most confusing and circuitous route to the hotel, Tati rummaged through her backpack and withdrew a couple of items. “Now, take this moustache and cap. No one should recognize you!”

Tony took one of the moustaches from her hand and put on the green cap. “But I already have a moustache!”

“It doesn’t matter. Stick that one over it.”

Tony blinked slowly at his reflection in a nearby store window showcase while Tati put on a moustache of her own, and a red cap too. “Seriously, we look like the Mario Bros.” She giggled at Tony’s comment. He had two moustaches on his face, and he did rather look like a famous, portly, videogame plumber’s brother.

“Does this make me Mario?”

Tony blushed. ” A female Mario, yes.”

Tati folded up the map and stowed it away. “Okay, you can stop scratching your mushrooms, brother. Let’s a go!”

Rolling his eyes, Tony turned to retrieve his suitcases…

“What th—?”

 

Catch other episodes in this series:
THE PILOT // Where Tati Makes Tony Blush
EPISODE 2 // Where Tati Makes Tony Choke

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2018

Open-Source Poetry Two #2

Dear Readers,

Today we received a wonderful letter from Von Smith of Above the Noise, and we cannot resist sharing what it said with you:

From: Von Smith
Subject: You guys inspired me

Tetiana & Tony,

Thanks for reading my haikus. Your 100 word skittle was a novel idea for me.

You also triggered another idea, 50 Words or less, which I did two experiments right after the skittle.

Thought you two creates might enjoy these.

Thanks for being you,
Von Smith

Well, thanks for being you, Von Smith! Your efforts have not gone unnoticed, and we’ve enjoyed them immensely! And we should confess right here that it’s a very mutual feeling. All of you, Dear Readers, inspire us every day! You never cease to amaze us. Your creativity knows no bounds!

And this leads us to our latest installment of Open-Source Poetry. Your submissions for this so far have been, without exception, exceptional! As you can imagine, it has been an onerous task choosing what the next line should be. However, we feel that Thom of tnkerr’s line is ripe with story possibilities, so we’re going with that. Congratulations, Thom!

So, let’s keep this rolling, Dear Readers. And let us remind you of the simple rules of this game…

1) We provide the next line of the poem.
2) You write the following line.
3) You submit your line via the comments section of this very post.
4) We pick the line we like most and add it to the poem.
5) We publish every line to date in a follow-up post.
6) Steps 1-5 are repeated until we have a masterpiece!

So, what are you waiting for? Amaze us all over again with all new submissions! We cannot wait to see what comes next!

Вензель

She looks in the book like into a mirror
The face of her sister is there
She wears daffodils in her hair

Вензель_нижний

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINATONY SINGLE & THOM TNKERR
© All rights reserved 2018

SPAM® Sushi #4

Singing worship songs is sweet however. That’s not the one option to worship. Daddy mentioned, perhaps to make Larry stop singing. There are lotѕ of ways to worship.
—Lon

Well, maybe it wasn’t a great idea for Daddy to expel little Larry Flynt from the church choir because look at what he’s doing now. It seems there really are a lot of ways to worship!
—Tati & Tony (Association of the Malicious, Evil & Nefarious)

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2018

MMORPB // Tati & Tony in Raiders of the Lost Snark Part Two (Moderately Multiplayer Online Role Playing Book 18+)

or: EPISODE 2 // Where Tati Makes Tony Choke

 

In our previous episode, Tony introduced Tati to Choose Your Own Adventure books. But Tati, like a real clever dick, quickly googled it, pretending to know what they were. Suddenly, a mysterious man in black appeared out of nowhere…

They’d decided to meet at the Greater Cachalot Mall, which was more akin to a bustling mini metropolis than an actual mall. Located on an island in international waters, it lay somewhere between Ukraine and Australia, and required no Visa to visit. Tati travelled there via the Trans-Zhmerynka Portalway while Tony took the TUMS Oceania Tube.

Tony arrived first, lugging three huge suitcases behind him. They were filled with god knows what, and the hotel staff were understandably curious. Who could possibly need that much crap? What the hell was it? Was it clothes or something nefarious like money for a drug drop? Tony did have the bedraggled appearance of a dealer after all.

Tati appeared twenty minutes later with her habitual backpack and a mint lollipop. She slapped Tony’s back, causing him to choke on his soda. “Are you drinking that slop again?” Tony winced at her pointed question. “You boob! When will you drop dead from diabetes? I won’t be coming to your funeral! And don’t complain that I didn’t warn you!”

They were looking at each other with a mixture of love and hate, and therefore didn’t notice a mysterious man in black slipping quietly behind them and making a beeline for Tony’s suitcases…

 

Catch the first episode in this series:
THE PILOT // Where Tati Makes Tony Blush

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2018

Open-Source Poetry Two #1

Dear Readers,

It looks like we’re pretty desperate. For the sake of poetry, we’ll readily bear anything. The last round brought us an invasion of cockroaches. We wonder what will happen this time…

A bout of saporous lolly acne? A rain of worthless bitcoin that darkens the skies for months? Our legs dancing an endless Eskimo jig? It’ll be worse than the ten plagues of Egypt from the Old Testament!

Still, this won’t stop us from providing you, our Dear Readers, with a safe haven for your collaborative efforts. “Collaborative efforts?” we hear you say. “What collaborative efforts? And to what purpose?” Well, let us fill you in…

1) We provide the first line of a poem.
2) You write the next line.
3) You submit your line via the comments section of this very post.
4) We pick the line we like most and add it to the poem.
5) We publish the first and second lines in a follow-up post.
6) Steps 2-5 are repeated until we have a masterpiece!

See? It’s the very definition of supercalifragilisticexpialidocious! So, have fun! But, please, whatever you do, don’t fling us in dat dere briar patch! We can handle pretty much anything but not rejection!

Вензель

She looks in the book like into a mirror

Вензель_нижний

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2018