Category Archives: TATI’S ESSAYS

A Three-Pointer

Do you know how to tell a good poem from a bad one? It’s easy. I can teach you.

Just crumple up a sheet of paper and throw it into the bin in the far corner. The bad poem never reaches it. It will always drop somewhere halfway, rebounding off the rim then rolling beneath your sofa. Argh! And there you go, swearing, to pick it up and toss it in from a little closer.

But the good poem always makes it. Hell… now you’re groaning and you have to go over to the bin to retrieve it. But, did you know… you can choose to forget it instead. Just leave it in the bin. Don’t worry. The really good poem will never leave your head. I should know. I’ve checked.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2016

Between edges

A road… just two edges and infinity between them. To step on the edge. To diverge from the road. To live, as if you’re immortal, is one edge. To live, as if your death is inevitable, is the other edge.

Edges aren’t the road.

Let yourself be immortal. Walking on the edge. Stepping over the edge. Forget miserable time. Look at yourself without the world. Your every step, your every gesture, your every thought… immortality.

Edges aren’t the road.

Let yourself be mortal. Walking on the edge. Stepping over the edge. Take your final step. Look at the world without you. Without your every step, without your every gesture, without your every thought… mortality.

Edges aren’t the road.

You don’t like edges. They’re dangerous. But if you deny edges… you deny the road. You learnt immortality. You learnt mortality.

You learnt… edges aren’t the road.

A road… just two edges and infinity between them. You go ahead. Infinity is under your feet. You took your road.

A courageous alive creature.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2015

a Happy weirdo

Nothing happens without rhyme or reason.
I don’t believe in the power of fate.
But I believe in the power of fake.

…One beautiful day you can find out that you are a blind and deaf dumbhead. It will be a quite degrading discovery, won’t it? OK! You should grieve about your underestimated and mistreated personality for five or six minutes. Don’t do this longer than six minutes! You must appreciate your time!

After that you can start an uprising. You should become a creep. You should put a happy mask on your face. You should look like a ‘Puttin’ on the Ritz’ man. By the way, if you will start to screw with perverts it will really be useful for your rehab…

Don’t think about the opinion of others and don’t forget the handcuff keys at a party! It is very important! Just do it…

Over time you may notice that you aren’t a creep and that you have a happy face under your happy mask. You can forget your old mask at a party one beautiful day… but don’t forget the handcuff keys!

Congratulations!
Your rehabilitation is over. Now you are just a happy weirdo.
And fuck all the world!

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2014

a Fractal

I am pressing Ctrl+S…

Now my last photo looks slightly gruff, but I wanted something like this. This shot was really good, without unnecessary guff. A hot summer day. An empty dusty road. A ramshackle road sign. A lonely cyclist under the scorching sun.

I am smoking and twisting a leaflet in my hands. I found it near my door this morning.

++++++++++[>+++++++>++++++++++>+++>+<<<<-]>++.>+.+++++++
..+++.>++.<<+++++++++++++++.>.+++.——.——–.>+.>.

Young Rewired Wave – Festival of esoteric and nefarious programming languages, San Antonio Fall 2014

I am pressing pedals…

I refused the car and now I feel like a coot. I am not a glamper. I prefer to use the achievements of civilization. And now I will be more careful with the term “an adjacent town”. And also, I prefer to use cutlery when I eat.

So, when I noticed a small, shabby looking bar I was very glad. By the way, it looked quite picturesque and I made some photos for my diary. The old door was wonky and needed lubricant. But inside the bar was cute. I ordered enchiladas and beer.

I am waiting for my beer and absently reading leaflets on the table.

++++++++++[>+++++++>++++++++++>+++>+<<<<-]>++.>+.+++++++
..+++.>++.<<+++++++++++++++.>.+++.——.——–.>+.>.

Young Rewired Wave – Festival of esoteric and nefarious programming languages, San Antonio Fall 2014 (to be continued)

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2014

H2O

I like thinking underwater… and in the darkness. The most splendid thoughts visit my head in the bathroom at nights. It’s impossible to imagine an infinite quantity of the great ideas that I had during my nine months bathing in warm amniotic fluid.

But my long hard way through the birth canal… my primeval shock when I met with the external world for the first time… It erased this layer of my memory. Completely.

I know that now I can spend all my life attempting to recall… in miserable and unavailing efforts to turn diamond dust into diamonds.

But I have a whole life for it… and I will.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2014