a grief with no name

fuck the god that put me here
and you over there
let him be nailed a thousand times over
for his crimes against humanity
and against me and you

i’m walking around in this tired old rain
each drop afresh with crying cliché
i’ve been so scared for the longest time
don’t know if i can diminish more
when hung out to dry how small will i be?

asleep within this well of days
my droom of dying in shadow
untying me from the knot of time
smashed upon the rocks of hope

how did this become a sodding wet dream?
body-shamed in the blood of christ
a third arm predestined for the drop
to be weaned and ghosted off of all grace
and this is when i recall i am nothing

so i breathe in the now, eclipsed in black
sun kisses, fool aye, no sun kisses for me
elsewhere, your shoulders a sun kissed hue
strange burning beneath a falsehood sky
all hope is lost but hope

asleep within this well of days
my droom of dying in shadow
untying me from the knot of time
fuck the god that put me here


© All rights reserved 2017

60 thoughts on “a grief with no name

    • This poem speaks to me because it tells poignant truth about human thoughts and feelings, our nothingness, the passing of time (love the “knot of time”), our fears and our relationship with god. It is an existentialist poem that reminds me of this kind of philosophy: Heidegger, Sartre… Love this line: “each drop afresh with crying cliché”. I see this as an honest critique of society’s corset, of those oligarchs who want to impose religion, a given god and so on to control the rest of us below. In general, I like the combination of words, the images and the musicality of all the stanzas, especially the one that appears again in the end. I had to look up a few words (English is my 3rd language). I found out about the origin of the word “droom” which means dream in Dutch, also a Germanic language like English. As I understand, droom is used in modern English as “dream come true”: https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Droom Hence the verses “my droom of dying in shadow”/ “untying me from the knot of time” seem to suggest the idea of our limited freedom in this world which philosopher Heidegger discussed in his book Time and Being. The voice of your poem lies in the depth of a well that could well be dream-based but it is also the human condition because of the limited freedom we are born with. Great philosophical poem, Tony!

      Liked by 2 people

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