Category Archives: POEMS

Oops!… We Did It Again (triskelion gospel)

Erm… hullo there. (This is rather awkward…)

Dear Reader, the stuff that was originally posted here has been removed.

We have done this because said stuff has since been included in one of our published books. We hope you’ll believe us when we say we’re not trying to be stingy. No, this has been done to honour the people who have already spent their hard-earned money on our eBook creations.*

If, however, for some reason you’re unable to buy one of our books, and feel you’ll die without seeing this piece of writing, then please contact us via admin@unbolt.me. We won’t allow our Dear Readers to fade away in the dark. We’ll send you the piece in question, and it will be absolutely free. All you need do is ask.

* Of course, we would be like two happy puppies if you too decided to buy one of our books.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016-2018

Oops!… We Did It Again (charcot thresholder (shower daze))

Erm… hullo there. (This is rather awkward…)

Dear Reader, the stuff that was originally posted here has been removed.

We have done this because said stuff has since been included in one of our published books. We hope you’ll believe us when we say we’re not trying to be stingy. No, this has been done to honour the people who have already spent their hard-earned money on our eBook creations.*

If, however, for some reason you’re unable to buy one of our books, and feel you’ll die without seeing this piece of writing, then please contact us via admin@unbolt.me. We won’t allow our Dear Readers to fade away in the dark. We’ll send you the piece in question, and it will be absolutely free. All you need do is ask.

* Of course, we would be like two happy puppies if you too decided to buy one of our books.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016-2018

A Bad Dancer is Always Impeded by his Testicles

My name’s Diego. Surname the ‘Prowl’.
On the pull tonight, struttin’ like a peafowl.
Cannot get enough of this demure goth chick
So I decide to woo her with my party trick.

Yeah, I do the mash.
I cut a rug and throw the scraps.
The muncher mash.
Shake a wicked hoof in cowboy chaps.
Trippin’ light fantastic. No, I’m not gay.
Just want the women and won’t swing that way.

No girl can resist the force of my mojo
When I twirl it about like a loco yo-yo.
Pelvic thrusts and crazy jitterbug.
Yeah, fly to me, my lurid ladybug!

Like, I do the mash.
I roll Stones and I do the Jagger.
The muncher mash.
I wobble my jelly with a ghastly swagger.
I’m the Man in Black, not a dusty rock star.
Just want the women and a hella cool scar.

I cavort with bodies like lightnin’ greased
’Til my arse falls off for the ghouls to feast.
On this night of All Hallows’ Eve
Even arms plop from their gory sleeves.

So, I do the mash.
Through this house of death I dare to tap.
The muncher mash.
My feet a whirl of ‘don’t give a crap’.
In this dance universe I’m immortal Duncan.
Tango, waltz, and freaky hula funkin’.

I twerk on the slab under strobin’ light.
When my brain drops out, a queasy sight!
It skids across the floor like a raw meat pie,
Half eaten, left alone to petrify.

Yet I do the mash.
This lust for her I can hardly quash.
The muncher mash.
My heart’s no more than charnel squash,
For on it she jumps like an undead foal.
I’m left cryin’ a river with the dungfly shoal.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

MS. POPELICK’S HOME FOR PECULIAR ANIMALS

do you remember that fateful day when
ms. popelick’s pet creamery got closed down?
she said, “screw your amen!” and scratched her head
capped as it was by a poppylike crown

you see, what she made tasted so damn good
her processed swirls of sweet death in cones
soused and canned sainthood, and of course
the chef’s specialty, fudge wishbones

she’d grind them up while strumming flesh smoothie
those soft-serve critters gave the church a bad name
animal rights stoogies sued and poked fingers
to stop the cruelty, debauchery, and shame

but she flicked the bean, forced the beasts to sign away
their status as fauna with pawprint, hoof and fluke
veggies for the tray, to dice, salt and roast
then she changed the signboard, and no one could rebuke

MS. POPELICK’S ETHITARIAN KILLING PLANT

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

GUEST POST // Peak of Loneliness by Purpleanais

After years
of dedication
a hell of a lot
of stress
a smidgen of luck
a bucketful of pure selfishness
and mighty hard work –
money, success
and power
are now yours to hold
you’ve got what you’ve always wanted
pushed everyone away for
you’ve finally found the fucking match
and set the world on fire
it’s blazing
dazzling
flames
as high as mountains
blue-oranges, reds, yellow-gold
not seen since days of old
Alas, you’re watching that intense glow
completely and utterly alone

by PURPLEANAIS
© All rights reserved 2015