Tag Archives: Writings

PERFECTION IN ACTION // Lay an Egg

Whenever I meet somebody for the first time, I don’t ask them where they work, what hobbies they have, and other bullshit. My first question is always, “How do you feel about platypuses?”

If they look at me as though I’ve suddenly grown a second head, I turn around and walk away. If they say that they love platypuses, I slap them across the face then turn around and walk away. If they say that they hate platypuses, I spit under their feet then turn around and walk away.

It’s hard to make new friends in this modern, soulless society.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2022

100 WORD SKITTLE // Writer’s Block

The pen is mightier than the sword, except when said sword is a pen in the shape of a tiny, novelty sword. Then it’s just two pens side by side, not causing much blood loss and mayhem, because… well, they’re pens, and pens don’t do that.

But here’s the thing. If you take a closer look, you can see that said pen is actually a sword in the shape of a regular sized pen. So, yes, then the first pen is mightier than the sword because it’s not a second pen in the shape of a tiny, novelty sword. It is actually a sword.

Yes, I’ve had a lot on my mind lately.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2022

phthalovision

air is especially fancy tonight
violet and green
a beatific palette of dappled light
both seen and unseen

my breath is deep, mind is still, and now
all is colour and chime
a local chemical plant, take a bow
for my zen inspiration respiration time

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2022

slippers vs the atom

a cockroach can survive a nuclear strike
but not survive being struck with a newspaper
and if i were the ghost of that cockroach
that had been taken out by a newspaper
i’d feel embarrassed!

i’d sit at the closed gates of cockroach heaven
waiting until their lunch break was over
trying to invent some heroic excuse
a war story for why i had appeared there
to not feel embarrassed!

in the garbage meadows of cockroach heaven
there are no newspapers, nor any slippers
just peace and quiet, and amazing grace
sung by veterans of the bug nuclear blitz
and none are embarrassed!

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2022

undeliverable

you arrived back home
letters ‘tween your teeth
the song on the radio
was ‘sunshine on leith’
you spat out the letters
and happily declared
that the war was over
we needn’t be scared

you ripped off the planks
opened the windows wide
let the sun shine in
on our ukrainian pride
the song on the radio
was cut by breaking news
of troop withdrawals
how we made russians lose

a sudden gust of wind
threw one letter to the floor
off the cuff i scooped it up
the return address i saw
i did not even know
that all joy could be stirred
sound and light could be cut
with only one terse word

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2022