Author Archives: Tony Single

Moses and the Open Eyed Sneeze (Chapter Three)

1 “Is this is your doing, Ze’ev? Don’t lie to me. I know your modus operandi!”

2 Zipporah throws a walnut on the table and slams it with the dildo. Bang! 3 The walnut spins out of control and takes off like a shot. It smacks against the wall beside poor Ze’ev. 4 He shrinks, taking a step back. Why is he always having to deal with this crazy family?

5 Not so long ago the weak-willed Moses was here paying for his weird order (muttering something about how a burning bush compelled him to do it), and now that same order is being brandished by his furious wifey. 6 Ze’ev is beginning to wish he’d never made the cursed thing.

7 “You love making pestles, don’t you? Be so kind as to make a mortar as well!”

8 Ze’ev doesn’t quite know how to react. What does she mean by this cryptic remark? 9 Is he ever safe with this mad woman around? It’s doubtful. 10 He nervously rubs one elbow, gesturing at the offending dildo with his free hand. His mouth is moving but no sound will come.

11 “Well, should I refresh your memory, or can you do it without me lifting my hem?”

12 Zipporah stands there, her arms akimbo, waiting for him to say or do something. Then it dawns on him. 13 She wants him to make a… 14 Oh. 15 My. 16 God. 17 When Zipporah sees the shocked look on Ze’ev’s face, she turns and leaves the workshop. She’s quite satisfied with the response.

18 I think that went very well.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

Moses and the Open Eyed Sneeze (Chapter Two)

1 A real gaga. Dumb-ass! I should have zonked him twice!

2 Mercilessly, Zipporah batters the walnuts with her new dildo. Bang! Bang! 3 They’re blameless of course but she doesn’t care. 4 Bits of shells sprinkle about like muted confetti, mixed up with nutmeat similar to tiny, mummified brains. Bang! 5 These walnuts look brainier that her hypochondriac croaker of a husband.

6 Zipporah stops bashing. 7 She smiles to herself, lowering the dildo. 8 There is something she can do with this situation. Yes, there could be a way to turn it all around. 9 Zipporah throws a light shawl over her shoulders, puts the dildo in her handbag, and sweeps out of the mageireío. 10 It’s time to visit the tektōn.

11 He gives me a mere dipstick? I’ll show him where he can put it!

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

Moses and the Open Eyed Sneeze (Chapter One)

1 God, my head is throbbing!

2 Moses has been donged with a donger, and not just any old donger but a replica of his own donger. It’s not often that an imitation phallus is used to stave your pate in on a date. 3 And not only that, it has a more pleasing heft and rigidity to it than your unconvincing flop of nutmeat ever will. It’s the oaken tree root to your withered sapling. 4 The humiliation!

5 Ruefully, he shakes his head. Moses can’t understand why she doesn’t like his gift. Zipporah can be so unreasonable! 6 His eyes follow the sway of her hips as, zephyr-like, she sweeps out of the kafestiatório with her new dildo in hand. 7 Even now, in her great anger, she moves with the fluidity of a belly dancer.

8 God, she’s enchanting…

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

Oops!… We Did It Again (Mortal Grinding Machine)

Erm… hullo there. (This is rather awkward…)

Dear Reader, the stuff that was originally posted here has been removed.

We have done this because said stuff has since been included in one of our published books. We hope you’ll believe us when we say we’re not trying to be stingy. No, this has been done to honour the people who have already spent their hard-earned money on our eBook creations.*

If, however, for some reason you’re unable to buy one of our books, and feel you’ll die without seeing this piece of writing, then please contact us via admin@unbolt.me. We won’t allow our Dear Readers to fade away in the dark. We’ll send you the piece in question, and it will be absolutely free. All you need do is ask.

* Of course, we would be like two happy puppies if you too decided to buy one of our books.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016-2018

Six Word Stories #9

Báthory giggled. Those weren’t cherry chocolates.

by TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016