100 WORD SKITTLE // Sweet Josephine

I threw that huge pink diamond into the corner and swore.

“What? Trash again! Not what I need!”

“Forgive me, Mr Tutin,” mewled Prump. “It’s the best in my collection!”

I don’t need sissy luxury shit! Give me a tough, solid, male piece of crap! Like a horse!” I shook my fist in his dopey face. “Give me an Adonis of the horse world and I’ll happily ride its brains out!”

Prump went over and picked up the diamond, blew the dust off, then pocketed it.

“Some people prefer unicorns, you know,” he huffed sulkily before leaving the Gremlin library.

© All rights reserved 2021

TATI’s & TONY’s DEAD POET TOUR // The Quest of the Purple Cow by Hilda Johnson

He girded on his shining sword,
He clad him in his suit of mail,
He gave his friends the parting word,
With high resolve his face was pale.
They said, “You’ve kissed the Papal Toe,
To great Moguls you’ve made your bow,
Why will you thus world-wandering go?”
“I never saw a purple cow!”

“I never saw a purple cow!
Oh, hinder not my wild emprise,
Let me depart! For even now
Perhaps, before some yokel’s eyes
The purpling creature dashes by,
Bending its noble, horned brow.
They see its glowing charms, but I,
I never saw a purple cow!”

“But other cows there be,” they said,
“Both cows of high and low degree,
Suffolk and Devon, brown, black, red,
The Ayrshire and the Alderney.
Content yourself with these.” “No, no,”
He cried, “Not these! Not these! For how
Can common kine bring comfort? Oh!
I never saw a purple cow!”

He flung him to his charger’s back,
He left his kindred limp and weak,
They cried: “He goes, alack! alack!
The unattainable to seek.”
But westward still he rode, pardee!
The West! Where such freaks be; I vow,
I’d not be much surprised if he
Should some day see

Public Domain Poetry