Tag Archives: Vladimir Putin

clusterfuck summit

tati says it’s time to replace
‘spanish shame’ with ‘american shame’
or, more accurately, ‘maga’—
‘moscow agent grifting america’

are you happy, fat elephants
rolling out the red carpet
for this political circus
this baked alaska of fascism

tony says it’s time to get real
the butchers of bucha want more
putin-khulyo & thin-skin trump
a shit lord stroll between the bodies

ahem, pechenegs & polovtsy
you say ukraine’s a fake country
lenin invented it, so—
‘we will kill & trade land, a peace deal’

ukraine’s not perfect, we won’t argue
but let us exist on our own
without your pallid botox cheeks
& edema legs, you fucking cowboys

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2025

ménace à trois

yeah, seagal loves putin, besties forever
see them carve it out in a heart on a tree
better still on warm bodies
& i’m sure their mutual wankery
is the one true path to enlightenment

why would they live to serve
when they can shirk all that’s deserved
shitting themselves in a shared hole
of their own making, always taking
we all know how this story goes

putin hates zelenskyy, enemies forever
see him carve it out on a nuclear tease
better still on still bodies
i’m sure his religion of geography
is the one true path to dominance

they both have skin in the game
a bit more so than you & me
yet all we can do is sit & argue
does might make right, peace less so
we all know how this story goes

yeah, trump loves trump, cahoots forever
see him carve it out on democracy
better still on nubile bodies
& i’m sure his lies & weaselry
is the one true path to supremacy

still dodging the arm of law
all we can do is cheer or boo him
& putin plays trump like a fiddle
as both try to outstrongman seagal
we all know how this fucking story goes

by TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2024

the bad seeds

when the snake & the sycophant sing
when you feel their bile in your brain
when their gravity well steals your future

their happy song
seeds your anxiety
with more anxiety

when babies become the enemies of god
when laying of hands makes more zombies
when downward dog summons demons

their pious song
seeds your anxiety
with more anxiety

when they lash the journey to your back
when the road outlasts the marathon
when you realise their song will end you

their fascist song
seeds your anxiety
with more anxiety

by TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2024

ABSURDIS EXTREME // Case Study #7,101,952 [10/04/2023] by B.A. Loney

Once upon a time, Vladimir Putin shot himself in the head and billions around the globe rejoiced. Steven Seagal, however, did not rejoice. He mourned the death of his boyfriend and never made another shitty martial arts movie ever again. And this too caused the billions around the globe to rejoice. The end.

P.S. Though one other person did cry… but who cares?

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2023

SUPERHERO SHENANIGANS! // Six Word Story #125

Hellboy: “My next mission; Russia, Putin!”

Hellboy & Putin

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2023