Open-Source Poetry Four #3

Our Dearest Readers,

We have an important question for you. It’s so important that we must lean close and ask it in hushed tones. You’d best lean in too, lest you miss it! Ready?

BOO!

Okay, are you scared now? Yes? Now you know how we felt. We were so scared when we saw how many amazing submissions there were for the previous instalment of Open-Source Poetry! How on earth were we going to pick just one to add to this new lyrical masterpiece? It wasn’t going to be easy.

So, after a great many incantations over blood-soaked prayer beads ripped from the entrails of a satanically depressed gerbil, we eventually settled on Munira Ezzi’s sparkling contribution. Well… we’re kidding, of course. How could we rely on silly bloody incantations? Only a coin toss would do. (Although we do find it rather strange that the results matched.) Anyway, her lines felt like such a logical progression from what had gone before, so we ended up agreeing with the aforementioned incantations and coin toss outcome. How could we not use her contribution?

Now, if you would like us to agonise over your contributions for the next part of this poem in a similar fashion, we suggest you pay attention to the following rules:

1) Read the current version of this communal poetic effort below, and marvel at how scarily good it is (or is that goodily scary?). Then submit your own line or two for our consideration.
2) If we like your line (or two) the best, we’ll add it to the poem, then we’ll publish said result in a follow-up post.
3) Then you keep submitting frightening wordage aplenty in an attempt to chill us to the bone some more!
4) And so the whole process of submission and rejection is repeated until we finally have a horrifying new masterpiece!

PS: For those who may still be recovering from their New Years hangover, we remind them of the topic to the poem… It’s in the style of a good ol’ horror movie!

Вензель

hm, what should I draw?
maybe a hairy monster with a furry claw
or a demon crow that sticks in the craw
or a huge bloodstained saw

hm, what should I write?
maybe a slow growl will stir up a fright
or a girl will be twirled by a meat-eating kite
or grandma pole-dances in a bikini too tight

Вензель_нижний

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA, TONY SINGLE, TOMAS MANKUS & MUNIRA EZZI
© All rights reserved 2020

Open-Source Poetry Four #2

All Hallows’ Eve has come and gone for another year, leaving behind it a trail of pumpkin seeds and M&Ms. Dear Reader, did you wear a costume this year? We did! Tati was a tentacled Cthulhu kitty, and Tony preferred to… well, cosplay as a plate of pumpkin mash. As usual.

But, alas, good things never last. All the skeletons have been shoved back into their closets, and all the ghosts have been brought to bay with proton energy streams. Now it’s time to work! That’s right, we’re serving up another slice of communal poetry for you to chew over and add lines to. Are you up to the challenge? If your answer is a demonic, guttural yes, then read on:

1) You see that bit of poetry down there? That’s what we’d like your help with. All you need do is submit your own line for our consideration.
2) If we like your line the best, we’ll add it to the poem, then we’ll publish said poem in a follow-up post.
3) What happens then? Well, you get angry if you’re among the unfortunate many whose line wasn’t chosen, and you vow to submit another one that will most certainly blow us away with its awesome astoundingness!
4) And so the whole process of submission and rejection is repeated until we finally have a horrifying new masterpiece!

So, yeah, that’s it! Now it’s your turn to sweat over that next perfect line. Meanwhile, Tati, Tony and Tomas Mankus will chill out with a well earned bag of trick-or-treating sweets… oh, and a cup of tea. Mmm… sacrilegious!

Вензель

hm, what should I draw?
maybe a hairy monster with a furry claw
or a demon crow that sticks in the craw
or a huge bloodstained saw

Вензель_нижний

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA, TONY SINGLE & TOMAS MANKUS
© All rights reserved 2019

Open-Source Poetry Four #1

Our Dearest Readers and Budding Poets (and Masters of Poetry, of course!),

We’d be lying if we said that Open Source Poetry is one of our least favouritest features here on Unbolt Me. Why? Well, it’s easy. We love the element of surprise that it brings. What scintillatingly fabulous line will you come up with next? What will you write to make us gasp in envy and wonderment as we struggle to match creative minds?

In short, communal poetry writing is a whole lotta fun!

Now, usually we’re the ones to start a new round of Open Source Poetry. We suggest the first line and then allow y’all to run with it, but we figured it would be more fun if this time we allowed you to suggest the first line of the new poem instead! Cool idea, huh? And, actually, while we don’t wish to restrict you in your creative efforts, because it’s Halloween soon, we propose that the theme should be ‘horror film’!

Here are the rules of this devilish game:

1) You submit the first line of our new poem via the comments section of this very post.
2) We pick the line we like most, and write the next one.
3) We publish the first and second lines in a follow-up post.
4) You submit the next line, we pick the one we like, and then we add it to the poem.
5) Step 4 is repeated until we have a masterpiece!

And with that, we sit back, put on our 3D glasses, grab a monster-sized tub of All Hallows’ Poppycorn™, and ready ourselves to shake and scream in horrified rhymed delight!

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINATONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2019

Open-Source Poetry Three #5 (Final)

Lordy lordy lordy!

It’s been quite a boat ride and a half, hasn’t it? It’s time to take down the Jolly Roger, ship oars, and uncork a bottle of good ol’ rum. And you, Dear Readers, have gone on this buccaneering journey with us. Just look at what we’ve achieved! A grand old sea shanty!

‘No prey, no pay’ as they say in the piratical code. So, no gold today! But we do have a bunch of words mashed together and lifted up in song. So, join with us as we belt out a tale of brave captain Ahab and his crusade to rid the world of evil dolphins! Oh, and let’s raise our tankards to obbverse who so ably put the lid on the whole matter.

Вензель

wet backs, sharp fangs, dangerous dolphin eyes
waves for crowns and blood in the water
they wade through utter slaughter
captain ahab, hunting still, with wife and son and daughter

with a yo-ho-ho, break out the claret
war is hell, so we’ll grin and bear it
yo-ho-ho, slap up the ship’s parrot
and sing with us ’bout men of merit

their harpoons at the ready, of fearsome size
all prepared to greet the impending crimson tide
it seems that the gore storm will never subside
’til every flippin’ morsel’s been filleted, battered and fried

with a yo-ho-ho, break out the claret
war is hell, so we’ll grin and bear it
yo-ho-ho, slap up the ship’s parrot
and sing with us ’bout men of merit

Вензель_нижний

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA, TONY SINGLERUNN1N90NEMPTY’S DAUGHTER, PETER’S PONDERINGCYNICALWORDSMITH & OBBVERSE
© All rights reserved 2019

A Song of Ice and Fire

Tati walks into the lounge room in a swimsuit and flip-flops. A beach towel is thrown over one shoulder. Tony walks in from the opposite doorway. He’s in a fur hat and a heavy woollen coat. He’s carrying a pair of skis.

TONY: Aren’t you cold?

TATI: Aren’t you hot?

They look at each other with suspicion.

TONY: Do I look like I’m hot?

Button is sitting in the corner, giggling. He feels like he’s about to witness something fun.

TATI: I didn’t mean if you’re sexy, dolt! Why did you encumber yourself with all this crap?

Tony lets out a deep, sad sigh.

TONY: Winter is coming. And don’t say I know nothin’, okay? I’m not Jon Snow!

Tati furrows her brow.

TATI: Who is this?

TONY: He’s a fictio—oh, never mind. What are you doing baring so much skin in the middle of winter anyway?

TATI: You’re unbelievable, Tony! Where’s your logic? A moment ago you stated that winter is coming. Now you’re saying it’s the middle of winter! Can you please pick one and stay with it?

TONY: GAH! Sorry! I guess really do know nothin’…

Button now has a tub of popcorn and a can of cola. He’s adjusting his 3D glasses as he watches this scene unfold. Tati sighs, and decides to change her tactic. She pokes her finger at a nearby wall calendar. The date is June 1.

TATI: Take a hint, Tony. Please.

TONY: Oh! Okay. It’s the beginning of winter then.

Tati gawks at Tony with great surprise. She hadn’t expected that heatstroke could have such a deep effect on someone.

TATI: You should lie down, Tony. I will call a doctor to come and check your head.

Tati swipes the can of cola from Button’s feeble clutches, and pours the contents over Tony’s head.

BUTTON: What the fuck?

TONY: What the FUCK?!

TATI: Did it help? I can add popcorn!

Button hides the tub of popcorn behind his back.

TONY: NO! GODDAMMIT!

Tony runs around in circles, rubbing his hair vigorously with his hands. He’s trying desperately to get it dry.

TONY: So freaking COLD. I need a warm towel! My kingdom for a warm towel!

Tati takes the towel from her shoulder and flicks it toward him.

TONY: Oh my god. Is that… effervescence I’m feeling? What if the bubbles get absorbed into my brain?

TATI: Then I hope it will revitalise your dried brain a little bit. And that you finally realise it’s bloody SUMMER.

TONY: Summer? SUMMER?! It’s so bloody cold I could snap an ear off, use it as an ashtray, and it still wouldn’t thaw!

Tati turns to whisper to Button.

TATI: Call the mental health facility. Tony is having a fit.

TONY: It’s winter! WINTER! Do you see me shivering here? I’m blue, for freak’s sake! I’m as blue and shaky as Epileptic Smurf! Button, call the mental health facility! Tati’s a raving lunatic! She thinks it’s summer!

Button rolls his eyes and does the ‘cuckoo’ sign at both Tati and Tony. He then takes some popcorn and…

Intrigued? Just click here to read the rest. It won’t hurt. Nor will it bankrupt you. We promise!

 

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2019