i won me a lollipop at the fair
a golden horsey with a wee eyesore
well, a grain of sugar what hadn’t melt
this blemishment gave me ma a scare
“lick it not, wee lassie!” she did implore
“’tis an evil eye what from hell-ter skelt!”

while me ma looked prayful at the sky
fumbled an’ mumbled, fair crossin’ herself
i stole me a wee tentative lick
well, ain’t nothin’ happened by the by
no lurgy, no hauntin’ nor broken shelf
no double whammy or triple kick

ma an’ me did ‘tinue ’round the grounds
buyed us eggs (three pennies a dozen)
hid our nyloned legs up on the ferris wheel
i licked an’ i sucked, slurpin’ wee rounds
sugar rushin’ gave me head a wee buzzin’
ma’s “let us hie home!” took on fresh appeal

by the time ma an’ me met pa at the stoop
naught but a stick were gummed to me palm
an’ me tummy were turgin’ somethin’ fierce
then there, the bridle, like an empty loop
fell from pa’s hand to mountin’ alarm
an’ news of ol’ clyde to sadden the ears

i cried at dinner and all through the night
at thought of our nag’s life all melt away
while i tongued in the sun, too much to bear
i were scold by me ma though real contrite
no lollipops for me the rest of me days
and animal crackers i’d ought beware