Monthly Archives: August 2016

You be the Judge

Sisterhood Forum International spokeswoman Mildred Tankard Smith was quoted as saying: “This is demeaning, inappropriate and troubling.”

Internationally acclaimed writer extraordinaire Tetiana Hennadiyivna Aleksina was quoted as saying: “Anyone care for a beer?”

Internationally maligned artistic ne’er-do-well Anthony James Single was quoted as saying: “I just like drawing boobies.”

Who cares if we’re about to be wildly improper? We don’t. It’s new Crumble Cult. It’s coming soon.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

Oops!… We Did It Again (Silent Snuff Movie)

Erm… hullo there. (This is rather awkward…)

Dear Reader, the stuff that was originally posted here has been removed.

We have done this because said stuff has since been included in one of our published books. We hope you’ll believe us when we say we’re not trying to be stingy. No, this has been done to honour the people who have already spent their hard-earned money on our eBook creations.*

If, however, for some reason you’re unable to buy one of our books, and feel you’ll die without seeing this piece of writing, then please contact us via admin@unbolt.me. We won’t allow our Dear Readers to fade away in the dark. We’ll send you the piece in question, and it will be absolutely free. All you need do is ask.

* Of course, we would be like two happy puppies if you too decided to buy one of our books.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016-2018

Oops!… We Did It Again (un[sole]mn)

Erm… hullo there. (This is rather awkward…)

Dear Reader, the stuff that was originally posted here has been removed.

We have done this because said stuff has since been included in one of our published books. We hope you’ll believe us when we say we’re not trying to be stingy. No, this has been done to honour the people who have already spent their hard-earned money on our eBook creations.*

If, however, for some reason you’re unable to buy one of our books, and feel you’ll die without seeing this piece of writing, then please contact us via admin@unbolt.me. We won’t allow our Dear Readers to fade away in the dark. We’ll send you the piece in question, and it will be absolutely free. All you need do is ask.

* Of course, we would be like two happy puppies if you too decided to buy one of our books.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016-2018

GUEST POST // I Saw Once by Sheldon Kleeman

I can see you’re
Sad and lonely
That your eyes
are sayin the words
Can you just hold
my hand a little
longer for us both
need another road
It’s never easy
to readjust from
one into another
But with both of
us walking……..
The road gets easier
I know how tired,
sad, just a little further
& we’ll be………
Just remember to
look into the “I’s”
of life
As I saw ones
who once were sad

by SHELDON KLEEMAN
© All rights reserved 2016

Moses and the Open Eyed Sneeze (Postscript)

1 Another year, another wrinkle in the face of Father Time. Moses certainly feels like that mythical figure, sans the wings, scythe and hourglass of course. 2 He sits on the porch in a rocking chair, smoking his pipe and keeping a watchful gaze over the two children playing in the sandbox nearby. 3 Gershom and Eliezer are still quite young. They’re the apples of their mother’s eye, and admittedly their father’s too. The fruit of their collective loins you could say.

4 Look at the cheeky scamps. They play so well together!

5 Moses allows himself an indulgent smile… and then sees the unthinkable.

6 Eliezer’s holding an object over a bucket in which the bubbling water is turning red. Gershom is parting that same water with another object. 7 His looks strangely like a… a phallus?! What the hell?! If that’s the very dildo that Moses tried to present Zipporah with some years ago 8 then the object in Eliezer’s hand must be the artificial va… 9 Oh my God! It’s Zipporah’s gift to Moses!

10 “Hey, you filthy ruffians! You’re not allowed to rummage through our… adult stuff! Children don’t play with parents’ toys! Gershom! Eliezer! Are you listening, Eliezer?”

11 The cute little boy Eliezer, the angel with gold ringlets, slowly turns to Moses. He smiles a disarming smile and, loudly and quite clearly, says one four-letter word. 12 Moses’s jaw goes slack.

13 Yeah, I guess he’s right. That is what you’d call it… Still, little boys shouldn’t use such profanity!

14 Moses is so shocked that his eyes remain fixed open. AH-CHOO!

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016