Tag Archives: 100 words

100 WORD SKITTLE // Unfrozen (Follow-up to Frozen)

Global warming had started neither here nor there. In fact, it wasn’t really happening at all. It was merely a bunch of hot air caused by a combination of baked beans and massively bearded Vikings farting.

They’d scratch their prodigiously hairy balls before getting out safety razors to shave them with. Their scrotums needed to be shaved carefully so that sparks from the friction wouldn’t set off a fire that burned away the Earth’s atmosphere and everything on it!

Unsurprisingly, that Once Upon a Time that was stored in the freezer began to melt, spoil, turning into a disappointing denouement.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2018

100 WORD SKITTLE // Frozen

Once Upon a Time, it was thought that all the Once Upon a Times in existence had run out. However, those in the know insisted that one remained, and that it was embedded in permafrost deep in the icy North where only massively bearded Vikings with prodigiously hairy balls dared to tread.

Such a fellow had stashed one in his freezer, mistaking it for a Happily Ever After that he one day planned to pull out and savour over a celebratory ale at his wedding feast.

But this is hearsay. You can choose to believe it or not. The End.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2018

100 WORD SKITTLE // Jump-Off (Follow-up to Push-Up)

That boob was rather more tangible than my eyes had led me to believe.

No mere shadow, it yielded beneath my boots when I jumped on, and as I catapulted away it sprang back into perky, domed perfection. Actually, I don’t know for a fact that it did. I was rocketing at such speed that I was physically unable to check behind me.

No bother. I was more interested in the giant, fiery nipple in the sky. If I could reach that then the Areola Belt wouldn’t be out of the question. Good thing I was wearing my space suit!

by TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2017

100 WORD SKITTLE // Suty’s Ascent (Follow-up to Keb’s Descent)

I learned to ride a pony a bit later on, as well as step up to the plate and be a household name. Had it been a bear it would have bitten me, but it was a mere pony.

I learned to do many things. Treachery, fratricide, mancipation… adult games were much more interesting, the rules were so easy to break. I became a headline player. I almost became a god.

Only one thing stayed beyond my control…

Do you remember where you were the day the red god fell? I do. Since then my eyes became blood red. Forevermore.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2017

100 WORD SKITTLE // Harvest

I checked the spotted page.

It looked like I’d done everything correctly. Hopefully the good sprouts wouldn’t be long in coming. I poured water into the pot and pierced a label into the soil. ‘Goldfish’.

At first my mother was happy. She adored nematanthuses. However, she began to smell a rat after a day or two. Ermm… smell a fish. Rotten fish.

She checked our aquarium and asked what we were studying at biological club. I answered, “Planting.”

Next day, my mother discretely put away all my books of Brehm and enrolled me in a dance course… just in case.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2017