Six Word Stories Omnibus: Volume Five

Time for more six word stories.
They were all written by you,
our dear readers. Oh my, yes!
We’ve finally posted them right here,
so don’t throat punch us, okay?
Such a long time to wait!

Story 1:
Six words can’t tell a story. 
Story 2:
What’s more, there isn’t enough substance.
by Sheldon Kleeman

Story 3:
Clever! Thanks for making me laugh.
by Daal Praderas

Story 4:
There IS peace in loveAmen!
by Rjoherman

Story 5:
I have a single porpoise tooth.
Story 6:
Tuna Safe Dolphin Meat is good.
Story 7:
“Please kill me,” my clone whispered.
Story 8:
I think these pills work fast.
Story 9:
My umbilical noose is too tight.
by Epic Fantasy

Story 10:
Sharks are nice. Hey, my arm!
by Phoenix Risen Poetry

Story 11:
Phew, what an interesting looking blog!
by Andy Smart

Story 12:
Love tried to take me alive.
by Kelly in ya Belly

Story 13:
“Where in Hell?” “Yes, you are.”
by Malakki

Story 14:
“Please don’t go.” “Don’t let me.”
Story 15:
She was a killer without heels.
Story 16:
The heart untied the mind’s knot.
by Nandita Yata

Story 17:
If you die then you’re mine.
by Dom

Story 18:
Give me a break. I’m dying.
Story 19:
Can’t you see? I am dead.
by Taizo

Story 20:
Am I a burden to reply?
by Lauren

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

Spam Sarnie #3

In 1937, long before either of us existed, spam was born. That predates the internet, kids. The freakin’ INTERNET! And instead of reading spam, people would eat it. The horror!

Still, that’s not as bad as what took place in 1965. Somewhere in a movie studio in Japan, a can of refrigerated spam was hit by a downed Soviet bomber, setting off a nuclear explosion which in turn caused Spamera to be born.

Spamera didn’t have an easy time growing up. He was both a bully and the bullied. Any time he used his immense turtle shell to crush his enemies, it only served to sink him into a deeper depression. He was a pacifist by nature but everyone wanted him to be mean because he looked mean. Talk about messed up!

It’s much like the spam that clogs our inbox on a daily basis. Messed up! Still, we try to be civil and answer it all. Well, sometimes we’re not so civil…

It is the best time to make some plans for the long run and it is time to be happy. I have learn this submit and if I may I wish to suggest you few fascinating issues or advice. Perhaps you could write subsequent articles referring to this article. I wish to read even more things about it!
– Kiersten

Of course, Kiersten! We’re renowned experts in the field of ‘how to be happy for the really long run’. Unfortunately, the funeral guys took our pen and diary away. So we died. Damn.
– So Freaking Over the Moon League

I have not checked in here for some time since I thought it was getting boring, but the last few posts are good quality so I guess I will add you back to my daily bloglist. You deserve it friend 🙂
– ydxsnsx

God. We’re so relieved. We were on the verge of shutting the blog down! Hell, we would’ve faded away to nothing had you decided not to come back and grace us with your magnificent magnanimosity of magisterial proportions. Truly, you are a king/queen/thing among… erm, other things!
– Your Groveling Sycophants of Pathetic Needy-Weediness League

Her work frequently appears on many Internet sites and on her own organizing site Clutter Free Living as well as in her monthly Home Organizing Newsletter How to Be Clutter Free
– ttkdqqlx

Yet how strangely cluttered your sentences and username are. Erm. Is that you, Tati?! Is there something you need to tell me? Am I taking up too much space here?
– The Something Something Fill-it-up-With-Anything League

I see your page needs some fresh content. Writing manually is time consuming, there is tool for this task. Just search in gogle for; Fejlando’s tips
– AshleighSecc

Oh my god. For a moment there I read this as ‘Fellatio’s tips’.
– The Just Putting That Out There League

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

Six Word Stories #12

They clapped. Birdman got the clap.

by TETIANA ALEKSINA
© All rights reserved 2016

Six Word Stories #11

Birdman dangled his wattle for hookers.

by TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016

Moses and the Open Eyed Sneeze (Postscript)

1 Another year, another wrinkle in the face of Father Time. Moses certainly feels like that mythical figure, sans the wings, scythe and hourglass of course. 2 He sits on the porch in a rocking chair, smoking his pipe and keeping a watchful gaze over the two children playing in the sandbox nearby. 3 Gershom and Eliezer are still quite young. They’re the apples of their mother’s eye, and admittedly their father’s too. The fruit of their collective loins you could say.

4 Look at the cheeky scamps. They play so well together!

5 Moses allows himself an indulgent smile… and then sees the unthinkable.

6 Eliezer’s holding an object over a bucket in which the bubbling water is turning red. Gershom is parting that same water with another object. 7 His looks strangely like a… a phallus?! What the hell?! If that’s the very dildo that Moses tried to present Zipporah with some years ago 8 then the object in Eliezer’s hand must be the artificial va… 9 Oh my God! It’s Zipporah’s gift to Moses!

10 “Hey, you filthy ruffians! You’re not allowed to rummage through our… adult stuff! Children don’t play with parents’ toys! Gershom! Eliezer! Are you listening, Eliezer?”

11 The cute little boy Eliezer, the angel with gold ringlets, slowly turns to Moses. He smiles a disarming smile and, loudly and quite clearly, says one four-letter word. 12 Moses’s jaw goes slack.

13 Yeah, I guess he’s right. That is what you’d call it… Still, little boys shouldn’t use such profanity!

14 Moses is so shocked that his eyes remain fixed open. AH-CHOO!

by TETIANA ALEKSINA & TONY SINGLE
© All rights reserved 2016